Most watermelons are cuckoo. They spend most of their time watching videos about extraterrestrials, conspiracies and Targeted Individuals. They are pretty sure the government uses alien technology to eavesdrop on their thoughts and beam voices into their giant water filled head. They were made crazy by the corporation that created them so they would grab the massive filet knife that people use to slice them into delicious pieces on hot summer days and they start slicing themselves. They are known as automatically carving watermelons. Just don’t get too close to them while they work.
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